Who Are You In Your Recurring Dreams?

Have you ever wanted to get far, far away from where you are? I constantly dream that I do. Nearly every dream I have at night is that I’m getting away from this current life and somehow flying away to a life more desired. I even had a dream like that last night.

I’ve always wanted to travel, and I’ve always wanted to see the world. I’ve always wanted the freedom to do so, and the freedom to do whatever I wanted. Because of the way I grew up, I never really had freedom to do anything. I was in the hospital so much that I genuinely that it was my ‘second home with the doctors’. I was also sick at my real home and sometimes couldn’t play with friends, not to mention financial restraints that I still have to this day because of my condition and the need to pay medical bills that are in the tens of thousands and even hundreds of thousands of dollars (thank goodness I have health insurance). But my point is this: I’ve always wished I had the freedom to just get up and go wherever I wanted. I always wished I had financial freedom to do whatever I wanted.

My dream last night was that I was living in another part of my country, a part I’d never lived before and have wanted to live in for quite a while. Me and my family were buying drinks at a small vendor that was near our house and I had endless change in my pocket for snacks. It was a very simple dream, but something that I fight to make a reality someday. I remember buying a soda for my mom in the dream. That’s something I haven’t been able to do in a long time.

I often dream that I’m doing things for others I love, as well. Like buying a soda for my mom, or doing something for my brother. It’s these things that I wish I could do in real life that I just can’t right now. But I have the aspirations that someday I will be able to buy a soda for my mom from a vendor, and that someday I will be able to do things for my brother. Someday I will be able to look up at a cloudless blue sky and know that the possibilities are endless.

This is why I’m a writer. I can do whatever I want. I can explore the world. I can create other worlds. I can go and do anything I’ve ever wanted!

I often have other dreams of making this amazing home theater in my own mansion (because I love mansions, though I’ve never stepped foot inside of one). This is because I love video games, and I think it would be incredible to have a huge theater that’s completely dedicated to that sort of thing, as well as Anime (one thing that has largely saved my life), as well as other small things like drinks and snacks. I don’t know why this is such an aspiration for me, but I’ve had recurring dreams about it for months. Maybe even years.

Lastly, there was another dream I’ve been having. I always dream there’s this large Victorian-era house that I own, and it’s so large that I literally get lost in it. There is room after room after room and I can never make heads or tails of it. But by the time I reach the center I find out that there’s a large party going on for some type of queen that is going to arrive. I always stumble upon the party. And in the center is a crystal fountain with beautiful water, and it’s so large that I probably couldn’t climb into the water at the bottom even if I wanted to. After that is a large staircase leading to a ledge that overlooks the crystal fountain.

Like I said, I always stumble upon this party, and I never end up finding out who the queen is. Meanwhile, there’s a beautiful song being sung in the background; something that I can never entirely remember once I’ve woken up.

The night before last, I had the same dream, but it was slightly different. This time, I was in the mansion with my husband (I’m not married, but I was with a specific man that I love very much), and I was pulling him from attraction to attraction, because the party for the queen was like some type of festival or parade. Though, at some point in the dream, he began running ahead of me. I was yelling at him to slow down, so he did. After that, I realized where we were: we were on the ledge that overlooked the fountain. After that, I realized who the queen was, the queen that I had never seen before in my previous dreams.

The queen was me. I was the one who was supposed to come to the top of the ledge and greet my people. I was the one that everybody was coming to see. And the person singing that beautiful song I heard every single time I had the dream? That was me as well, though somehow I didn’t know it.

My husband (in the dream) wordlessly pushed me forward to take my rightful place as queen.

The reason I tell this story is that I think dreams have so much more meaning than we ever give them credit for. I find that my dreams tell me things that I’ve never before known about myself.

Have you ever had dreams where you’ve discovered things about yourself? Or do you have weird dreams where you’re squeezing gravity-defying toothpaste into the air and your brother has turned into a collection of floating trumpets? (That last example is a dream I had when I was a child. Seriously.)

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