Uninhibited

Uninhibited, I am someone who speaks what I want and need. In these dark hills, I walk away from greed.

Unaffected, I am the one who keeps trying, because I’m not fond of life dying.

Unreal, I reach towards the stars, knowing that my fingertips reach far.

And understanding, to know that I know exactly where I’m landing.

In this world of terror and worry, I won’t allow it to steal my flurry of love and truth, honestly something I hold so dearly to my heart.

I want to be who I am, and I will be. Because the only person I can be is me.

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Gentler Creatures

These days together lately have been rough. But I find myself to be tough. Toughened by the challenges that lie in front of me, but not hardened by what they create of me.

I wish that I could’ve done better in the past, but what’s done is done. There’s nothing I can do but move on.

As I allow my face to turn towards the light with the sun to shine on my features, I will forever understand that I am one of those gentler creatures.

Light

My bare feet grace the ground with their presence; soon being filled with the essence of truth and happiness. For I walk towards the light that lifts me, that of which brings my anxiety and depression away from me. And in these steady days, I will find peace in many different ways.

As I search for ways to help others and to bring happiness to myself, I find the book of my life upon a shelf. Upon the shelf of everything I ever needed; these words I say now which were created.

Bring forth the greatest happiness you can find, for I dance with joy and unwind. Filled with flower dust and the nectar of life, there’s nothing that should bring forth strife.

And in this broken soul, I find myself mended once more. My words flowing, flowing towards the shore.

Never Say No

Thinking myself to burnt out, the words no longer coming to my mind. I am not burnt out, but simply having to mine for the words that line my very thoughts. I never thought I would be filled with infinite possibilities; but with disabilities.

Nothing can stop me from dancing to the renegade’s song. On my own I am strong. I make my own path, take part in my own life. Making passageways through the labyrinths that are mine. Mine and mine only. To me, they are holy.

I love who I am for once, and I will never give up this chance to do so. To my own self-love, I will never say no.

Cure

And there was no other way it could have been done. The chances were none. Save for that one; the one who knew their own worth, who knew who they were. Truly, and knowingly.

The world can’t crush you if you give no stalk into what they say. They’d have to find another way, but even after the last light of day, they will never be able to say they brought you down.

I’m discovering this more and more each day of my life. It’s almost a right of passage, to let go of that baggage and to start anew. For the only and only way I walk is the one that is true.

Divide the good from the bad, the happy from the sad, and you will be glad that you never got mad. These things you fought for won the war and even as you open this door you will surely find the cure.

Tomorrows

Holy love. To cherish it is to bring these words nigh. To understand it is to know these things from high above the tree tops, into the heavens above.

For you are not who you believe to be. You are so much more. Filled with a value you have never seen before. Bring with you this hollow shore, for it shall surely bring you more than ever before.

Loving you is something simple, something true. Something only your real friends are will to do. In the evenings of doubt and the nights of sadness, remember that if you were to give up it only cause madness.

For I often ask myself why. Why did this person die? Even if not in the flesh, but within the mind. Something that isn’t easily understood among our kind.

So reach out your hand and allow yourself to see. These things that I say shall surely be. In these doubts and sorrows, there will always be another tomorrow.

As my mother always told me before, “that’s what tomorrows are for”.

Shore

Among these lights are the stars that shine bright. Among this night are the tales told without fright. I want to know where the world ends so that I can follow it back to the beginning, just to relive the start. I want to feel the creation of us, I want to take it to heart.

There are so many things I yearn here to say. But only small words out of my mouth do sway. Thank you for your love and light, I’ll never forget them this way.

And now as I feel these things I find myself in a happier place than before. I feel as though I have finally reached the shore. Strong beams and pine trees, the scent of it all overwhelms me. But basking in the sun’s rays is where I’d rather be.

I feel these things so fair and know that I am meant to be here. Perhaps you are two, and we could dance in eternal solitude.

I find myself getting better, kinder, stronger than before. This all came to me when I happened upon that shore.

So take these words, these rhymes; and come with me into the forest of time. These things so fine forever shall be mine.

Wanderlust

I have this intense, almost unbearable desire to roam, to leave, to possibly never come back. I’ve always wanted freedom and I’ve often wondered what it would like to feel so…free. With nothing but the stars to guide me, no appointments and nothing to worry about. It was a simpler time when people lived like this, and I envy it.

It’s not that I don’t love where I’m at or that I don’t love the people I’m with; I just find myself with this unquenchable thirst. The thirst for the stars and truck beds and wonder and fresh air.

Perhaps it’s because I’ve lived in a bubble most my life. I’d like to believe that I can make it there someday; to a place I cannot yet fathom. I’d like to believe that my journey has only begun for my intense desire to wander.

Is it hard? Yes. Is it scary? Maybe. Is it worth it?

Absolutely.

This World

I hate it when I can’t sleep, because that is when my mind gets creative. That’s when I start to think of how many crocheted dish cloths I would have to sell in order to become a millionaire. I’m not kidding.

We live in a society where we have so much that we can do. We have TV, Internet, video games, shopping…etc, etc. Yet, we sit around bored all day because none of it interests us anymore. None of it is new anymore.

I remember being a kid, and everything was a new and fascinating experience. I often wonder where that involvement went between the world and our minds. We don’t stop to look at flowers because we assume we already know exactly what they look like, but could we honestly just grab a pencil and piece of paper and render a perfect primrose flower on that paper with zero mistakes. Odds are, we can’t. This is because the world as we perceive it is not the world that actually is. It’s not nearly as boring and old as we think. In fact, it’s not boring and old at all. Yet, we see it that way. This is where I think we need to start putting our iPads and iPhones down and observe the world around us. Technology is a tool, not something to rely on completely.

So, perhaps as I can’t sleep and don’t feel good while I’m sick, I can take a pencil and a blank sheet of paper….who knows what will happen when we look around us and draw one random thing as realistically as possible? In my personal opinion, we will find that it isn’t that boring at all. In fact, it’s as beautiful as the starry night above us or flowers in a field of green grass.

We just have to choose to see it.

Humanity

My top two idols are Taylor Swift and Michael Jackson. I love their style, their grace; the way they hold their heads high and brace themselves for the world. I love how they interact, how they are kind, loving, generous, and loyal to their fans and family. I love how they are so similar, yet so different.

I’ve dreamt of being a singer since I was a little girl. Since before being a teenager, actually. I’ve worried about many things. Watching the hell that my two favorite idols have gone through has made me realize how risky an endeavor it is to make your way into show business. Michael Jackson was torn from the top, and they are currently trying to do that to Taylor. But why?

Here’s my theory:

Anybody can be jealous of success. It’s human nature to want things that you can’t or don’t have. At least, that’s what I believe. But I miss the days of my childhood where I believed that everyone would do things for the better; that they would be trustworthy and lovely. But that’s not so. The world is a dangerous, dark, and horrifying place. Though it doesn’t have to be, it is. I think the reason that Michael and Taylor are torn down is because they have reached the top – the highest of the high within their communities. Taylor has reached a place in her songwriting that no one else has met, and we all know how Michael Jackson ended up where he was. But the funny thing is that they are both incredible people (although Michael has passed, I still think of him as here, still with us).

I believe that the world fears incredible people. They fear the happiness, kindness, and light that these people can bring. Why? Because once you cast light on something, you will see its shadow. Once you revel in something that is wonderful, you will realize how hard it was before. Nobody likes to see the sins of their own people, and although we are all different races and we speak so many different languages in different nations, I consider us all one big family. The family of humanity.

Humanity itself can be cruel. No other living being to exist has purposely sought out to harm one another. Not one other creature has sought out to kill one another, simply out of spite or revenge. And as humans, we try to keep these dark things a secret. We hide them in the darkest, innermost corners of our minds. We put masks on. We lie. We smile when we don’t mean it. We fight each other and kill each other, all for the sake of ‘fighting for freedom’. So, how does this translate to show business?

When someone is at the top, it’s not simple to be happy for them. It’s hard, as human nature makes us jealous; it makes is spiteful, and it encourages us to fight against one another to put them down in order to feel higher than that other person. It’s the same as war, the same as bombing other countries. Why do we fight in wars, kill others, and commit these crimes? Because we want to prove that we are better. Because we see the other side as evil. Or perhaps it’s simply because we want to watch someone fall and be able to say that they are lesser than us. But within history, this has only lead to chaos. This has only lead to more genocide. It’s a simple formula, really. Success + jealousy = violence. It’s not enough to think in one’s mind that they are jealous or that they believe that one person doesn’t deserve what they have. It’s not enough to write it in a journal or even scream it from the rooftops. No, we have to take action. And that’s where the mistakes of humanity come in. That’s where we create those unchangeable parts of history that will forever be a blemish on our reputation.

I often ask myself why. Why do we do it? Why are we fascinated with death, violence, anger, and troubles? And if you think we aren’t fascinated with those things, then simply look to the nearest TV. What do most, if not all, of our TV shows and movies center round? These four concepts: death, violence, anger, trouble. We are fascinated by the fall of another while we are angered at our own falls. I’ve often heard it said that it’s a dog-eat-dog world out there. Meaning a dog will commit a crime against its own kind for the sake of gaining a level in the food chain.

This saddens me.

In the back of my mind, all I can imagine is a rainy, desolate city, torn to shreds by others that believe they are superior. But are they really superior? I am American, and I live in a developed country. Does that make me superior to those that aren’t American, and to those that don’t live in developed countries? No. But does it make me less than them? Of course not! I’d love it to be simple, but it’s not. And it never will be.

Our desire to tear others down to make them smaller than us so that we can feel bigger will certainly end in our demise. How did the most evil or even the most powerful people in history die, or end? They were killed, either by themselves, or by someone else.

We think that we want power, but what do we do once we obtain that power? Once we get that far, maybe we don’t know what to do. But in the end, power truly is the substitution or replacement for something else. And what would that other thing be?

The desire to be loved and understood.